Transformative Relational Therapy
Transformative Relational Therapy
I specialize in transformative outpatient Relationship Therapy (AKA Marriage/Couples Therapy) and Individual Relational Therapy. I also offer adjunct EMDR. I am licensed in MA and also VT for telehealth; for other states, I can see you if you travel to MA.
Authenticity, self-love, personal responsibility, and agency are necessary ingredients for fulfilling lives and relationships. However, many of us have been socialized to follow fundamentally different guidelines. When we follow all the "rules" but do not get the life or love we want, we may suffer from feelings of anger, frustration, fear, grief, resentment, and helplessness. We may also experience profound loneliness, which can be especially painful when it occurs within relationship with others. In this state, we may become lost, living in fear over our current or future fantasies, and denying ourselves and each other love, acceptance, and compassion.
I believe that increasing attunement and acceptance towards oneself - in essence forming an attachment to the self - leads to empowerment, which provides the strength and confidence necessary to live a meaningful life and deeply connect to others. I also. believe that relationships to others are more fulfilling when they are conscious. See my other pages for more details.
My overarching aim is to help you live and love consciously, according to rules that serve you and those you love.
While there are times when relationship injuries need to be unpacked and healed, my focus tends to be on providing in-the-moment opportunities to access authentic emotion, build confidence, listen to and treat oneself (and partners) with compassion, and experiment with new ways of being. Ultimately, my work helps clients awaken from the spell of toxic rules and expectations and free themselves from the prison of isolation, anxiety, rage, shame, blame, and silence.
I aim to be a candid yet compassionately motivating guide to increased experimentation, bravery, and intimacy as I help people develop a clear sense of self and, when working with couples, compassionately disentangle from relationship dynamics that are causing pain. This process can lead to a variety of outcomes, from a reimagined relationship with oneself, greater sexual, emotional, and spiritual intimacy with others, and with couples, sometimes a mutual decision to separate with compassion.
My EMDR work is focused on alleviating suffering associated with trauma. EMDR ultimately can allow you to access difficult memories without being overcome by painful and debilitating emotions.
Intimate Relationship (Couples, Marriage, ENM) Therapy
Topics may include:
Individual Relationship Therapy
Adjunct EMDR Intensives
Couples and ENM/Polyamory Intensives
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